BANG YOUR HEAD

While I try my best to be an upbeat, optimistic positive person……some days I fail…royally. Today is one of those days. During my Groundhog Day existence, today, August 4th, I find myself angry, frustrated and tearful about absolutely everything! So, I go on my nightly bike ride which I really didn’t feel like going on in the first place, but I figured I’d feel even worse by not going.

I always listen to music on my bike ride and the one song that always seems to make me feel better is Quiet Riot’s “Bang You Head”. Mind you, I am the last person one would find at a heavy metal concert…..but this song, I swear, is the anthem of the year for 2020. The first part of the song’s second verse is SPOT ON:

Well, I’m frustrated……Outdated……I really want to be overrated……I’m a finder……I’m a keeper……I’m not a loser and I ain’t no weeper.

This is EXACTLY how I feel this year, I’m frustrated…..about things too numerous to list here. Outdated.…duh, lynnelovesthepast is my blog and practically everything around me today reminds me of something or someone from the past. (which was, for the most part, better than the present)….I really want to be overrated……I would love to recapture the heady feeling of writing a really kick ass newspaper article or taking that “million dollar shot” photograph that conveys the true feeling and essence of the subject captured…..

I’m a finder….of great stories and interesting people which I would write articles about, in the past, and hopefully again when the economy stabilizes. I’m also a finder of practically EVERYTHING that goes missing in my house; including my wedding ring which was lost over Father’s Day weekend and found by me in the most dusty, filthiest corner of the basement……I’m a keeper……..I know a few people who think this about me, even when I don’t believe it about myself……

I’m not a loser…..this is difficult to remember as of late when dealing with unemployment, parenting ever changing teens and handling the stresses of getting older…..and I ain’t no weeper……Oh HELL…yes I AM! I wish I were not such a fragile flower and sentimental schmuck at times! A few weeks ago, when stopped by a lovely neighbor who innocently and sincerely asked, “How are you?” I literally stopped my bike, got off and sobbed in front of her……Is this normal adult behavior? I don’t think so……but lucky for me, my neighbor invited me in for a chat. This small gesture showed great caring.

Even before the ugliness of 2020 became apparent, I really liked the song, “Bang You Head”. It’s an anthem about anger, frustration and exasperation; feelings that seem to sit just below the surface of my nice, sweet Catholic mom exterior. Besides, blasting this song from the clip speaker on my bike makes me feel just a little bit bad ass!